Right where you should be

One of the beautiful things in life is that everything happens for a reason. It is so easy to just throw this sentiment around at people; especially when you don't know how else to console someone out of their misery over a bad incident. You tell them; it's okay because everything happens for a reason. It is such a cliché thing to say but guess what? Everything did happen for a reason.

Even the littlest things in life are meant to happen where and how it is supposed to happen. Over the weekend I was once again reminded by this beautiful fact and I think to accept it in all its forms be it positive or negative will somehow allow us to be more conscious of the Divine Being managing all our affairs.

Sometimes I would find myself recalling my past mistakes, of things that I wished I had not done, or things that I wished I had avoided from happening. But then it would always end up with me trying to connect the dots and finding out that without that one particular mishap, I wouldn't even be where I am today. 

I found myself asking, is it possible to be here if I were to just take a different route 5 years ago? Why did I choose this over that? Is it possible for me to get that thing if I have not chosen this particular path in the first place? Whenever I try to put aside just one particular event in my life that I vowed to never repeat again if I were given the chance to redo it - I would always end up putting that event back into the narration because without it, my journey is incomplete. It's like this connecting flight that would somehow bring me to my next destination. 

I was mindblown. By my own realization, lol.

Of course if I were given the chance to fix my past mistakes, I would definitely will but I realized these mistakes are meant to be there - meant to happen anyway. I wouldn't be here reflecting on my past decisions if my past mistakes had not taught me anything valuable about life. And boy do they taught me a lot! Ha ha. 

Sometimes we whine about why did God let us commit certain things, why did God put on us trials we (thought) we couldn't bear, why did God choose us to go through that particular hardships instead of putting that friend of ours to test. Why God why? Why ME? We whine about this all the time, I'm guilty as charged but little did we know it all happened just to steer us in the right direction, it all happened just to bring us to the next destination, to where we are meant to arrive at and isn't it beautiful? To be able to understand that whatever happened to us has been decreed by the Almighty even before we decide on which path to take or which decision to make? 

One of the things I used to question about is why didn't God let me be with my husband (then friend) sooner? Like, we were friends since forever now, we were super close. Why didn't I think of getting together with him sooner? Why didn't I have feelings for him sooner? I always told my husband, we could have saved a lot of heartbreaks and wasted little time if we had known we would end up together. But Sansan being Sansan, he told me... (guess what? drum rolls please) everything happens for a reason!

Yes of course it happened for a reason. We pondered upon the reason - how we are able to appreciate more, how we are able to be a better person, how we are able to mature in time with when we finally got together. How we are able to learn from our past mistakes, how we are able to be more honest with our feelings. Masha Allah the reasons are endless but it is all for our own good. Our past mistakes brought us together, alhamdulillah. What is more beautiful than that? The Being who has allowed this to happen in the first place, of course! (cue endless crying in my heart)

Mistakes shouldn't be frowned upon, nor should it make you feel less worthy of your future. Our mistakes are meant to shape us in a way - be it spiritually, physically or mentally. Our mistakes are meant to teach us. But of course we have to have good faith in Him, that we believe His plans for us is the best. I love love love this verse from Surah Al-Hadid 22 & 23:

"No calamity or blessing occurs on earth or in yourselves without being written in a Record before We bring it into being. This is certainly easy for Allah."

"We let you know this so that you neither grieve over what you have missed nor boast over what He has granted you. For Allah does not like whoever is arrogant, boastful—"

These two verses are the reminders on how we should leave our matters to Allah, that whatever happens in our lives is all planned out for us, and for our best. Knowing the fact that everything happens for a reason has also strengthen my faith in the fact that everything happened for my own best.

To a friend, my dear friend, whom I had a pleasant chat over the weekend, one who had inspired me to write this in the first place - I have nothing but love and good thoughts for you and all the things that you have been through. Allah has indeed place you in such a position that you couldn't even imagine going back to but alhamdulillah, look where you are now. It's amazing isn't it? His ways and His plans for us? I can't even imagine us being friends again after those silly bitter fights we had over a boy last time. Yes, I am shaking my head right now just thinking about it.

See? He has His ways. And I still thank Him right till this minute of putting you in my life - even after all these years. For keeping you close to my thoughts, heart and prayers. I pray for nothing but the best for you, my dear friend. 

And for the rest of us, let's just have faith in Allah - on where He's taking us, on what He has in store for us. Save yourself the trouble in worrying too much. We're all heading for the same destination after all, let's just enjoy the beautiful and different routes He had all prepared for us. 

Great, now I feel like crying again. I'll write on a silly stuff next post ok. Have a good day!