Can there be too much free time?

I can't believe I'm finally back to work. I don't feel like I have had enough cuti, if I can be honest but at the same time I don't feel like I can even tolerate longer holidays. Especially when I can't do much and my mind is always wondering about my workload piling up.

BUT. 

I can't say that I didn't enjoy the holidays. Well of course I couldn't do anything the first two weeks but I did read a lot of books though. I mean, I wrote a lot about starting to read again, how I've been abandoning my books yada yada and I finally gave them some love. I actually managed to read 9 books in just one month. Made me realize how I am indeed capable of finishing a book - only if I wanted to. But yes, time plays an important role too so since I basically had no problem in that area, I don't see why I should procrastinate anymore.

I have also spent the whole one month of cuti reevaluating my relationship with food. It took me awhile to finally come to terms with the fact that there are certain food that I need to avoid at all cost and there are some food that I need to cut down. It took me so much time to accept that because those food kinda belonged to the food-I-cannot-imagine-living-without group so.... I think it's fair if I just gave myself ample time to adapt. (still trying to coax myself out of this misery, if you can't already tell)

I have also realized how I introvert I am. Or maybe I am an extroverted introvert. Or is it introverted extrovert? Because I value my alone time like crazy. When I say I value; I meant to say I prefer being alone than having a company. I made it clear to my friends that I didn't want to be visited. But some insisted and I didn't mind. But the truth is, even when I was sick, even when I knew I needed assistance, I still prefer to be alone.

God knows what I mean so I hope God forgives me for feeling this way.

I also had so much heart-to-heart sessions with myself. And also with my Love. The whole one month of cuti made me realize how lost I actually was (and perhaps, still am) when it comes to being honest on what/who are the things/people that I really like to be involved with. I took the time to list it all out; my no's and my yeses. My don'ts and my do's. I realized that I have also been bottling these all up.

Crazy what two weeks of being alone can do to my head. But I'm glad I had that chance. I even took myself out on a date to Kinokuniya for one whole day (it was the day we were supposed to leave for our anniversary trip but it was cancelled due to the obvious reasons). And I loved every minute of it.

Do I want more free time like this? Of course I do. But not if I had to go through a painful experience before that. Ok lah. Next time I write about happy things lah.

Bye!