Answered prayers

I'm sure we all made a lot of du'as (supplications, or in an easier term: prayers) in our lifetime and we still continue to do so. When we want something so badly, we make du'a for God to give us what we want. When something bad happens, we make du'a so God will help make us strong. We make du'a for so many things but have you ever really looked back and wondered how many of your du'as have been answered?

I used to be so reluctant in making du'as. I do make them after my fardh prayers but to ask something specifically from God; I don't know if I have the right to do so. I used to feel like I don't deserve to ask anything from God, I don't deserve to ask God to grant me anything -- especially after all the shitty things I did, and after all of the things He wants me to do but I didn't do them. I used to feel like making du'a is a privilege and I don't deserve such privilege.

I know, I istighfar-ed like crazy when I thought about my "lost" days. These days, I really cannot imagine my life without them du'as that I make on a daily basis. I don't want to sound boastful but alhamdulillah God has given me more than I could ever ask for.

One of the things that I know for sure He has gifted me with is the constant presence of my parents on this side of the world. I know this might sound selfish but deep down I always feel so hesitant of going back to my hometown but at the same time I wanna see more of my parents. I remembered making such du'a last year, when I saw this one Facebook post about the diminishing number of days we are able to see our parents. I made du'a to God so He would allow me to see them more often and alhamdulillah, this year has been such a blessing to me.

The same goes to the anger in my heart. Allahu akbar, I cannot even deny the change my heart had gone through in this particular area. Asking Him day and night to give me a brand new heart, a heart void of anger. Alhamdulillah I can see the difference now, albeit I sulk pretty easily too nowadays haha but it's okay. Now I'm just grateful that my stone heart is slowly becoming how it truly should be. And I'm still making du'a to God to allow me to have this heart always. I'm getting very mellow now I feel like crying already. Tsk.

So many things have happened by His Grace and so many prayers have been answered by His Mercy and Love. It made me realize there is no such thing that God won't give you if you could just truly ask. And the only reason why some things have not yet come your way, is simply because He knows what's best for us and He knows better. But never, as in NEVER stop making du'as. That's all I want to say.

May Allah make us among those who remember Him at all times, and may Allah make us among those who will continue to ask from Him because truly, He is As-Sami and He is Al-Wahhab.